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Hi I'm Lily Kelley

artist. philosopher. nutritionist. free spirit. registered voter with the constitution party. raw milk drinker. and i'm a mormon.

About Me

I am a convert to the LDS Church. My parents taught me about Heavenly Father all throughout my childhood, but we were only occasional church-goers. I have always believed in God and never really questioned His existence, but I had never really realized or considered what His existence means to me. That all changed when in the seventh grade, two dear young men in white shirts and name tags knocked on our door and invited our family to Church. It wasn't until I was fourteen and a freshman in high school that I was baptized. All that conviction, Spirit, and love for the Gospel faded when I gave into peer pressure and began smoking marijuana and engaging in many other serious sinful behaviors. I lost touch with my dear Heavenly Father and earthy parents. One bright and glorious day, I woke up and wanted to attend Church. The day happened to be Sunday. We did, and I felt the warmest, sweetest, most joyful presence piercing my heart, telling me that this is where I belonged, that I was loved and forgiven, that I was home. I am never going back to my old ways again. I am currently a senior in high school and still going strong in my love for God and His Son and Their Church. I know it is true, and much like Alma the Younger, I learned that wickedness never is, never was, and never will be happiness.

Why I am a Mormon

I know it's true. It brings indescribable joy into my heart and soul. Simple as that. :)

How I live my faith

This is tricky for me. I have been struggling with Scrupulosity, or religious obsessive-compulsive disorder, for a little over a year now. OCD is defined by disturbing, intrusive, and unwanted thoughts about anything from sexual matters to religion to germs and cleanliness to violence and fear of violence to colors, patterns, and order. I have experienced all, but I am currently struggling with the religious side, so the way I exercise my faith is tricky for me to define. I have learned that the OCD thoughts are nothing to be ashamed of and are not sinful because I have absolutely no control over them. But it's hard for me to tell when I am being too extreme in my behavior. I have knocked on strangers' doors late in the evenings attempting to share the Gospel with them. I am not a full-time missionary, mind you. I stopped listening to anything other than Church music, stopped wearing cute (but modest) clothing that I enjoyed wearing just because it made me feel pretty and I felt like that was sinful to feel pretty (it isn't). Logically I know these behaviors are extreme and not what God wants for me, but I feel an immense amount of anxiety when I don't practice them. So how do I live my faith? I hold onto it for dear life some days. I try to read my scriptures, and I have found ways that work for me, but that is difficult for me at times. I love to attend Church, and I'm grateful that my illness isn't so debilitating that I can't do that. I know God is patient with my efforts and is happy to just see me try, even though my capacity to actually perform isn't always great. He just wants me to try.