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Hi I'm Ryan Christopher Meservey

I'm a Mormon. I like to congregate with other Mormons on Mormon websites. This is one of them. Hear my prayers. Also, on mission.

About Me

Hello there, passerby. Let me extend a warm handshake to you from behind this computer screen. Sorry if you were expecting a hug. I'm on a mission and hugs are forbidden, but really the best reason for my handshake is that I'm sometimes pretty awkward that way. Maybe, from now on, you could motion like we're going to hug, but then go in for a fist-bump, and that could be our thing. So now, we're both standing here together. I'm looking at my feet, looking down at my life. I went to college for a year because Politics! Now, I want to go back because Philosophy! Or, Math! My mom thinks I'll be Homeless. We'll see. In high school, I used to run forward for several miles before running back for several miles. Sometimes the runs were in loops, but they always seemed to end where they started. I enjoyed cross-country; you don't need to get somewhere to enjoy something. Still, I wish I had gotten somewhere. I wish I had found someplace so forward looking that I didn't have to turn back. So it was with high school. I'm still looking for that place. This isn't a "and then I became enlightened and have come to fix you" story. My story is messy. It is still messy. Yet, I don't think I am directionless anymore. In praying, in doubting, in stumbling, I found the markings of a trail. Forward, I run. Woah! Friend, I've left you standing there for quite a while. Please, share your story too. I'd love to hear it. All people are interesting, you know; just some are bad at marketing it.

Why I am a Mormon

I like to think the place at the end of my journey will be filled with this purest most pure love that doesn't need to turn inwards to be felt outwards. That place would be filled with persons upon persons whose stories I could feel. Admire. Right on the border of this view, I would sit. Entering in would corrupt the experience. The experience, the place, may always be on the border looking out. Why am I Mormon? Well, my passively inquisitive friend with mad computer skills, I am Mormon because I trust the testimony the spirit has given me. Thus, I am Mormon. That's a gratefully present tense statement. A few months before leaving for my mission, the church was probably true. There were too many things Joseph Smith got right, too many miracles among the people, and too many doctrinal compliments to Christianity for me to weigh the argument in the negative. Yet, the church remained for me an argument. It was an argument to a heavy question left unanswered. God can answer us quickly, if God wanted to. Our Creator doesn't do that often. Quick revelation cuts off our growth. Getting there makes the destination a memory; quick revelation is impermanent. Dang, that was a hard lesson to learn. Please be a faster learner than me. Spread across a journey of contentedness, pain, dictation to God, and eventual conversation with God (in a non-literal way), I have come to know the reality of our loving heavenly Caretaker. I know God lives. God loves. The spirit has touched me so personally, so warmly, that if I said otherwise, my heart would know the lie. I was Mormon for lots of reasons: background, family, social pressures. I am Mormon, because I believe. "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him." James 1:5 ----I'll look for you in the joy and sadness of our shared human experience. Goodbye, have peace

How I live my faith

"How do you live your faith?" You're a good question ask-er. And, if that sounds too disingenuous, then you're a good page scroll-er. I'll assume you've made it here. *fake hug, fist bump* I live my faith like a soldier who notices his badge once in a while and then straightens his posture. My faith reminds me to be a little nicer, a little more empathetic, a little more understanding. The more I learn about Christ, the more I want to be a lot of these things and not a little. I'm working on it. Currently, my position in the church is official testimony sharer. As a missionary, I walk around high-five-ing people with my testimony. This is not the full extent of my sharing, however. The walking itself must give--my words, my actions, my person are to bring others closer to Jesus Christ. Living my faith is hard; living with faith is essential. Hope in overcoming my frailties keeps me going. Whenever I lose that hope, I stop growing. I am looking back again.